Labels matter: Challenging conversations or challenging people?
LABELING ENDS REFLECTION
An additional and unforeseen risk to labeling is the end of meaningful reflection. When we label, we stop asking who this person is. What trauma did the person suffer that makes trust so difficult? What is he or she most afraid of? What am I contributing to this ineffective dialogue, and how can I adapt my own language and behavior? We have a professional responsibility to respond to frustration or challenges with patients, not with labeling in return, but with humility, listening, and reflection.
BEYOND LABELS
To truly enhance communication and the experience of our patients, we must model empathic curiosity. People are not the label we give them. They are not the disease they have. The richness of their lives, experiences, and emotions cannot possibly be embodied in a single word that we have assigned. Our role as healers requires not judgment but the willingness to know more about who they are and the skill to more effectively express our intention and meaning. Only then will our patients feel truly “seen” and known by us.
To that end, there are a few models of effective communication. One of them, the Relationship: Establishment, Development, and Engagement (REDE) model, was developed at Cleveland Clinic,6 and a recent study found that when physicians were trained in it, patient satisfaction, physician empathy, and burnout improved.7 Another, the Four Habit model, has been effectively used by Kaiser Permanente for decades.8 These models provide a framework and detailed skills that can be used with any patient, loved one, or colleague, especially those we find “challenging.”
In addition, Groves and Schuermeyer et al highlight the impact these difficult conversations have on the clinician. Because most clinicians care deeply about the patients they serve, they are haunted by conversations that don’t go well. When patients are unhappy or angry with our care, we often feel that it is our fault or that we have failed in some way. Alternatively, we seek to distance ourselves from the patient we find challenging.
EMPATHY IS HARD WORK
The most difficult work actually goes on in the space between withdrawing from our patients in anger and continuing to enable inappropriate behavior at an emotional cost to ourselves and our colleagues. That in-between space is an opportunity for the clinician to set boundaries and be consistent, while also seeking to build relationships based on empathy and trust. Otherwise, both parties walk away labeling each other, which prevents us from building relationships with the patients whom we find difficult. Relationships still matter in healthcare and have therapeutic benefits for our patients and ourselves.
Empathy is hard work. When we connect with the patient in front of us, empathy may be easy. Yet the real need for empathy is when we don’t connect with the person in front of us—when we feel frustrated, tired, and angry. And I believe as healers—not just doctors—we are absolutely up for the challenge.
